one night and one day

it all started swirling,
in my head, in reality.
swirling swirling swirling.
i didn't sleep...
too much noise.
i wasn't awake,
because i was dreaming,
i think,
and i wasn't drunk.
it all moved very slow,
like the ticks of a clock,
waiting and wondering
what would be next.
then he spoke,shattering the idea that i was in fact dreaming,
and brought reality crashing down to it's very core.
it's all been real.
the entire thing,
and Bobby's not waking up this time.
in the time that it took the clock to tock,
everything had changed,
everything's existence was solidified,
and every chance of turning back,
was gone.






lost footage of LIAM, damn when he walked in i almost died.
blue eyed puerto-rican and italian.
good lord.
shot on the 18th story rooftop of the legendary 95 christopher st.
when life was good.

bear prints

Dear Diary,
it's just as good,
if not better than,
the way i thought it would be.
it was magnificent, flawless, unstoppable fun!
the Albany NY Gay Bear party was tonight.
i saw a daddy bear that was hot as fuck,
but he ignored me.
even though i'm feeling fat, i wasn't enough.
i thought before i left i might die tonight got putting up that song i posted earlier.
but no, i am forced to live out longer in this existence of hidousness i call my life.
but i had fun,
went with a "sober" crew...ALWAYS fun.
and am home by 1:00.
Buddy's in bed,
i'm drifting off,
but thought i'd leave some bear prints in the blog tonight.
xo
Joe

Tonight

it's all about tonight.
u might not get tomorrow.
live your life.
enjoy.
give me everything tonight...
u might not get tomorrow.

I Look To A Nicer Me

a bad dance remix is always good.
especially a Whitney one...cause u know bitch hates it and can't do anything about it being out there.
i've been reevaluating my meanness, and well,
i think i should try and be just a tad nicer these days.
try it anyway.
it can't hurt.
being nice is the best way to catch flies my grandmother used to tell me.
and so, i think i will try and begin a new mantra.
i will be nice!
there, i said it.
i can still think anything i want.
winter storms have come
and darkened my sun...
i look to u.
after all my strength is gone,
with u i can be strong.


yawn.
well, i've been nice for about ten minutes now and nothing good has happened to me...
so, maybe i'll just go back to being a nag.
here's some of my classic j/o shoots, Pierre fitch. he walked in, hated me...3 minutes later when he saw how i was shooting him, he loved me. sweet boy.
have a great saturday.
be nice!

the making of a porn flick

there are very few good things to  have been able to get from knowing such a hideous troll like Michael Lucas, but i found one today...
images  from La Dolce Vida, the film she spent all her hooker money on trying to become a real Hollywood icon. of course, it didn't work, BUT, the beautiful images are still around, in my possession,
for me to distribute as i see fit.
if there's anything nice to say about the "star" is that his ass implants didn't pop out once while filming.
thank God.
he did hand me the script for this debauchery of cinematography, and asked me to read it, all 60 pages of dialogue and 4 pages of sex. interersting.
but these images won the best box cover, and a way for me to always hold that, one more thing, over his head.
i hate her, if you didn't know, and as well you should too.
it's a long, strange story, and one i will one day have time and patience to tell.

here's some cock...

censor happy

i think i may be on a hitlist.
or watch list anyway.
i get censored more than anyone i know,
and for what reawson?
facebook's deleted me 11 times now,
3 blogs have been deemed "too much"
and my photos,
well...
i'll censor them myself.

                             

classics

classics
never out of style.
timeless.

reworked:

suckin' off Al Parker's cock

suckin' off Al Parker's cock

brandon n vinny

bear fair photos 2010

Voices Inside My Head

in my head i hear voices

one says relax and shut up,

the other says go and don't stop till u drop,

they like to play tricks

and games they do play

on my poor little head

in my bed as i lay.

they make me want to dance

an uncontrollable dance,

from the tip to the toes

and by the seat of my pants.

and they make me want to know

what it's like, could i see

what it's like when a year is an anniversary for me.

but i know myself better,

and i'll fuck it up,

not for any other reason

except i know myself, but,

could this time be the time?

could this day be the day

wen my life takes it's turn

and again, i regain

control of myself,

of my dreams hopes and fears,

and look back on them kindly

in a couple of years.

this time is the time.

no more time to waste,

it's now or it's never

and you're alone in the race.

all u want

it's not like you come to me,

think of me,

or count on me,

when you want to read,

so...

 

Aint Nobody

what a week.
i had anxiety and nausea all week.
but it's over.
i need to stand up,
take a step,
a big step.
i need to leap far,
jump high,
and run fast.
i'ts time.
i'm ready.
i hope.