i was almost an abortion

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

HOLE-I-DAY OVER-LOAD

House Music New 2009 - If I Were a Boy remix - Beyonce


                          oh yea, right...it's thanksgiving...
    so much to be thankful for...
 
 only 29 more shopping days till christmas, then a week of returning shit your aunt gave you, and then it's new years eve...what? you don't have plans...or a date?! well then, you must be a complete loser...how pathetic. 
you can feel like a loser, if you want, dress like one by shopping at Forever 21 when you're really 41...or, you can relax, smoke a big fattie, and relax while your mom cooks the turkey, you can choke your chicken all day all night...and if your grandfather is still as ornery as grandma used to say, challenge him to a good old fashioned blow-off, and see who's really packin' the family jewels...



 OMG, 12 4 real-
 http://www.bonertube.com/videos/33062/12-inch-monster.html?utm_source=easygals&utm_medium=network1&utm_campaign=mike


10 things to love about being 18-
http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=Naked+10+Year+Old+Boy&view=detail&mid=26AA6C05FD48446941D826AA6C05FD48446941D8&first=41




jail or master bait-
http://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=405700863&utm_source=PBWeb&utm_medium=PT&utm_campaign=PBWeb 


well dressed man (unfortunatly)-



a better reason to join a gym-


all grown up-

jock-supporting our troops-
http://gay.porn.com/videos/these-two-cocks-love-to-be-fucked-16775.html?utm_source=easygals&utm_medium=cpm&utm_campaign=easygals#


completely str8, ok-
http://www.bonertube.com/videos/31869/blowjob-on-sofa.html?utm_source=easygals&utm_medium=network1&utm_campaign=mike






   something about defeat-


ok, ok, u win-

http://www.gotgayporn.com/videos/36328/sucking-monster-white-cock.html?utm_source=easygals&utm_medium=network1&utm_campaign=mike

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

so, what's next?




                  so, what's next?
       where do u go when you've already gone down the side roads and back alleys, been to heaven and hell and then some?
you've wreaked havoc, broke barriers, signed your name, exposed yourself,
there's no where left to turn run, or hide...
                     nothing more to be said.
because you've already said too much,
didn't even know you had all that to say.
and the returns on the investments 
                     that you've already made
            show no sign of life, just decay.
and the more of you that you give
leaves them expecting double the next time.
wondering who, when, where, why,
                but never asking "how much?"  or exclaiming "how divine!"
              when you give it away for free,
           you hope that it someday pays off.
        the idea that it will be appreciated 
        or returned 
just goes to waste, 
it won't happen.
     so leaves your mouth with a bad taste...
what more do you want?
what more do you need?
i'm bleeding, i'm breathless, i've empty...
               but you still say "whatever.."
               expect more more more!
and if it isn't perfection,
                     you just close the door.
so now, exhausted from the ideas i've lent
from my open book of a life, sans repent,
             my head dropped from exhaustion,
             my mind empty and spent,
             nothing more i can do, nor say,
             lifeless, i lay...
all alone in the cold room
no one asks "you okay?"
that would be all to kind,
too much to ask, i must say.
           nothing's late, nothing's needed, 
          nothing's pressing, nothing's left,
         and so again i ask you,
         so now, what's next?
                             can you tell me?
                            do you even care?
             or am i just here to be drained?
             left empty, broke and exposed...
nothing inside me remains.
                 there's got to be something.
                         there must be a way.
          when you give all that's inside you
          you hope someday they'll repay...
but all you can do is cross fingers 
                      and just hope and pray.
                 but the masses are fickle...
                  they've already moved on...
                           to the next thing,
                                 the new one,
          the hot trend of the moment, which,
         has no idea what's about to come...
         cause their times almost done.
will they ever stop and say thank you?
ever give credit where it's due?
ever say "wow, amazing!"
that would be too good to be true.

so once more, i repeat
 because i don't have a clue...
i ask you, what's next?
 no reply?
why would you?

don't even know why i'm upset,
no, i guess i do...
it's the way of the world
but it's time that they knew...
              this drains everything from me.
              i honestly think that i'm done,
             but then something inside stirs,
      and the whole process again, has begun.
God, please, this time, save me... 
                   let me learn from my past. but i know better about me, and i know this won't last.

as i look up to the sky, right into the sun,
              i know that i've already lost
                     and again, you have won.
                    












wtf?

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

what's (kinda, very) HOT

http://www.asstr.org/search.phphttp://www.asstr.org/Madonna - Justify My Love (video)



wanting...
waiting.
yearning...
for you...
to justify my love...
to justify something is to give it validity. to make it seem ok, alright, even fine. without justification, things that some may view as "taboo" are things that others just may find hot.
just because it may not be "normal" doesn't mean it's not happening all over the world...maybe even in your own town...or next door.
but it's not for you to judge.
it's not for you to ask why.
because it's only fantasy anyway.
right?





i don't wanna be your mother.
i don't wanna be your sister, too.
 http://fapdu.com/taboo-12-incest-sex-mother


talk to me.
tell me your dreams.
that's right.
tell me...
am i in em?

sometimes you just don't even see it coming.
then, there it is...from out of the blue...
and it hits you like a ton of bricks. 
you don't know who what when where or how...
but you know that your no longer the same
 person you were, just seconds before.
and you have to pinch yourself to be sure it's real...because when it's real, i mean, really, REAL... then nothing will ever be the same, ever again.

Monday, November 19, 2012

really?






when he looked at the clock
panic rushed through him.
how could it be?
where did it go?
how had he let it all just slip by
without noticing it was gone?
was he that much of a mess?
really?
wow.
he had no clue.
 
 
it was at that very moment  when he stopped himself from looking at a clock
 ever again...




 
 
 
 
 

Sunday, November 18, 2012

imagine.

Madonna - Jump [Confessions Tour DVD]






THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY SHOW,
BUT THE NIGHT IS YOUNG
AND THE SHOW HAS JUST BEGUN...


as the curtains raised, the crowd scooted closer to the edge of their seats, as the orchestra grew to a creschendo and a dusting of smoke whiffed in from the sides of the stage, the lights in a crimson/pink hue lifted from the stage floor up,
                                   creating an illussion of sunrise.
it all felt like a dream, like an illussion, like something i wasn't sure was really happening, but then, pinch me, it was...


in reality, it hadn't even been a full two months since i stormed outta town, swearing never to return to this sorid place of discontent. i had been betrayed, wronged, cast out and left to die alone...and yet, even so...i was still alive, was still standing, and even, i must say, a little taller...it hadn't happened, the death sentance i believed was put like a spell upon me, nothing was as awful as i'd expected it would be...the faces i had damned to hell and back were looking me right in the eye, smiling, with caring eyes, worried, and wondering with good hope what had been going on in my life, and even wishing in good faith that everything worked out for the absolut best...
maybe it wasn't them who had been the bain of my existance...
maybe it was something larger than life even,
greater than the population,
more powerful than nature,
more vast than the galaxy...
or maybe...just maybe, it was me.
the one that always did create my greatest source of anguish, kept the good things from becoming great, destroyed all of the hope and possibilities with the simple stroke of a match, was nothing, no one more, than myself.
imagine how foolish i felt.
imagine.
but the greatest actor stood tall,
head high, shoulers back,
proud and erect.
all sources of discontent
put aside,             
all issues of neglect
forgotten             
any and all ideas
 of a grand scheme against him 
forever let go...                            
it was time to start again,
from scratch.
with nothing in his way to hold him back, no one in his circle to  hold him down, and not a thing in his head to keep him away from becoming the brightest star in the universe...
the star he was always meant to be.
the thing he always wished to be,
the man he always hoped to be.
t
and so the show went on...
to great success,
with critical acclaim,
and an extended run.








Saturday, November 17, 2012

whatever happens,

click here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Q6xx0JfMBI






 
                     make it happen.







http://art4thecause.com/tag/joe-oppedisano/





http://home.planet.nl/~detogt/yearbook606.htm

whatever happens,
no matter what...
it all works out in the end.

so try as you might,
curse all you can,
scream and hollar and raise the roof if you wanna,
it don't matter at all,
it won't mean a thing,
it just wasn't meant to be,
and so the only thing to do
is just say,
"fuck it..."
and move on.
 
 
only the wisest men can let go and relax and move foreawrd to a higher place where understanding one's limitations is the better than any college text or course...
for if it's meant to be,
it will be.
if not, then it's not even worth worrying about,
because in the end,
if you got everything you wanted,
you wouldn't appreciate and understand the importance of something wonderful
when you have it right in front of you.
 
just let it go...just get over it, just say "fuck that!"
and move on
move forward,
move beyond.

 
 
 
 
 





 
 
 
 
 
 



 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Marilyn Monroe

“I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.”


Marilyn Monroe
 

everything happens






everything happens for a reason.
seconds tick, hours pass, seasons change, time goes by and everything, good or bad, falls into place to fit perfectly into the grand scheme in which it is all supposed to be. there’s nothing really bad that happens that isn’t specially hand delivered to you that you can’t handle, nothing you can’t get over, or anything you won’t get something from. it’s all in how you see it, and all in how you ingest, and then, use it. 
in your past,
you saw things that shocked you,
watched things happen that scared and amazed you, experienced things that were useful to develop your mind to view it in your very individual way of seeing things.
i thought i had seen it all,
but then,
my eyes started to open, and i started to see
all the things i thought were unimportant, 
were the very things i have always found so sweet
the exact things i had been missing,
and the one thing i couldn’t quite find in my life.
but when i winced away the blindness 
and saw them grow,
watched them change,
saw them be,
and enjoyed them in a different light,
i realized that i had been given a gift.
something rare,
something wonderful.

it had been 3 decades of insanity for me to understand that  what was the most important, after all, 
is something that needs to be  looked up to,
deserves to be cherished,
and  is worth the time to  get to experience.
i had forgotten just how sweet it is to  open my eyes in the morning with a sense of calmness, 
a simplicity of mindset,
and a smile on my face.
when i look back on my last 3 years,
all i really recall are the happy times,
the laughing,
the closeness,
the  simplicity,
and the love.
as i recall it,
every morning around 8, before my eyes had even opened, my fantastic dream would be interupted abruptly by a “crunch crunch, crunching” sound
then my father would giggle, as my mother in the living room, would turn a page of her newspaper
and say something funny, and by the time my eyes were wide, i’d have felt everything everyone seeks in their lives. the unselfish, un-requented love that has made man through history march in battle to save to guarentee it’s existance for humanity and the hope for a better future.
this is, in the end, what it’s all about. if you have this, you will never again question why not, wonder what for, or ask how come, because it all makes sense.
after having the unexpected opportunity of spending time so close with the two people i’ve known since before i even knew, i learned that things are actually, good. people are actually, nice. life is  actually, important, and must be seen with eyes that respect, honor and praise it, for it’s all you truly ever need to fill your core with everything it craves, needs, lacks, and deserves.
these two people helped me understand that in life, nothing is easy, but everything is there, for free, 
if you want it. if you open your eyes, wide, and see the beauty in everything you take for granted, understand that the smallest details mean the very most, and take the time to give back, unselfishly and without the favor having to be returned, you get back a gift that is something that moves mountains and parts seas, raises spirits and makes the world a much better place. i have seen the extremes, have lived on both sides, and just when i thought i knew it all, i was taught the true beauty of life, given the keys to explore what i thought i already knew, and appreciate the things i always assumed would never not be there. but this time, i was given front row seats, and although at first glance i was upset, second glance intrigued, and third glance hooked, for the true meaning of life was always here, well, there, at 4 alton road, where it always all made sense, never quite was appreciated, and will forever more be the place i call home. and the time i spent in that house with these two “friends” changed me, shifted everything i knew, created someone better and opened up something desired. 
i will never ever forget those days back at 4 alton road as the most peaceful, wonderful, fulfilling days of my life. i am sad that it took me so long to see, but am so glad that i was given the chance to see them anyway. 
today, i am blessed to have been granted such an incredible gift as the two i call my parents. my father, who today we celebrate, is an inspiration for me. he always is smiling, he never is upset, rarely complains, and  he is simply perfection of what i envision a “real” man to be.    i proudly can call him, the man who showed me what a good man is and how a great person can be. he has no idea that what i see in his eyes and feel in his hands and from his heart, are the very things that i have never seen in anyone else. he is the man who made me feel good about being a man, showed me the meaning of dignity, the need for kindness, the effect of gentleness, and the outcome of what they all can do to make everything around you be exactly what you really, truly, need.
they aren’t millionaires,
they aren’t movie stars,
they aren’t anything to everyone, but they are everything to me.
as i look around, i see love, i see happiness, i see pride, joy, and i see a mother and a father that i am so proud to call mine,  and so thankful to be celebrating with, that the only thing i could wish for, was a million more years by their side. 
my world was made and uplifted, nurtured and raised by the two greatest people i know,
and so, i would like to raise my glass as i bow my head, and say humbly and with respect, thank you, you have no idea, and wow...i am a lucky, lucky man.
without you, i’m nothing.
with you, i have become more than i ever imagined.
i love you.
joey         

salut!