what if...

so, i was almost an abortion.
which means, i almost was never here.
which means i never would have seen, done, heard, felt or experienced
anything i have.
which means i never would have given anything back,
which means i never would have left any marks,
which means you would never have noticed,
which means i never would have been able to have touched you,
which means you would never have missed me.
but instead, i was born,
and made a mess of everything.

nervous grumble

in my stomach i can feel it...
it's a grumbling
not a noise, but a feeling.
everything's coming together,
into place, and all that's left is the actual thing itself.
i think i know how it will play out,
but my head is second guessing
certain situations,
and how they might play out,
and how i'll handle them.
it's tough having to take control,
although for me, its second nature.
is it a grumbling or is it nerves?
i'll just stop myself now,
and call it a nervous grumble.