i was almost an abortion

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

OPP (Ultamix remix)

OPP (Ultamix remix)



and this is why u down....















Running Up That Hill-again.

Placebo - Running Up That Hill


when you're at the mercy of someone who isn't really that capable...
what do you do when enough is enough?

who do you call when you've called your own bluff? and how can you stay on track when you yourself can't move forward enough to know the bad things you've done are just silly stuff that you'll never get over unless you stop them and trust that tomorrow is better if you can get past the rough?

so i sit and i think, how can it be?
has it really happened, is it real, or possible, or a dream?
have you been mis-diagnosed for so many years, or is it all just that the drugs from the first diagnosis weren't strong enough? 
so again i ask,
what do you do when you're at the mercy of someone who isn't really that, capable...
(and that person is you)





  there's a thunder in our hearts.
it's you n me...
u n me won't be unhappy.
if i only could
make a deal with the gods
get him to swap our places...
be running up that road
be running up that hill,
be running up that building.

Oops up

Snap! - Oops up 


IS AS GOOD AS IT GOT
AS GOOD AS IT GETS?
WHEN AS HARD AS I TRY
DO I HAVE TO TRY HARDER?
WILL THE MISTAKES THAT I MADE
EVER MAKE SENSE ENOUGH TO LEARN FROM?
WAS IT WORTH IT, IN THE END
OR DID I DESTROY IT AND CAUSE THE END?

THE QUESTIONS I ASK ARE NOT QUESTIONS I KNOW THE ANSWERS TO, THEY ARE THINGS THAT I THINK I KNOW, BUT ACTUALLY NEVER EVEN COME CLOSE TO KNOWING BECAUSE I'M TOO RETARDED TO GRASP THE REAL EFFECTS OF EVERY MOVE I MAKE ON EVERYTHING AROUND ME.
IS IT TIME TO GROW UP?
IS IT TIME TO LOOK AHEAD?
IS IT POSSIBLE TO NEVER KNOW?
IS IT PROBABLE I'LL NEVER MOVE PAST, RISE ABOVE OR MOVE ON?
 
 HAVE I GRASPED THE LAST STRAW AND PULLED UP THE SHORT STICK?           WILL I EVER LEARN?

WHEN IT MAKES LITTLE OR NO SENSE, BUT MEANS EVERYTHING AT ONCE, AND CREATES EVERYTHING THAT I KNOW TO BE EVERYTHING I QUESTION, AND EVERY SENTENCE I SAY REGURGITATES INTO SOMETHING THAT NO WAY CAN BE TRUE, HONEST OR JUST, MAKING IT ALL BLAMED ON LUST WHEN THE SIMPLE TRUTH IS, DISGUST HAS TAKEN OVER TWO PLUS...

AS I LOOK AROUND, I SEE GREATNESS, POWER AND FAME, BUT LOOK CLOSELY AND ALL THAT IS THERE IS THE PAIN THAT IT CAUSED LONG AGO AND HAS NEVER GOTTEN BACK, MAKING MILLIONS OF ERRORS TURN THE WHITE INTO BLACK. DOES IT EVER MAKE SENSE, WHEN I KNOW WHAT IS REAL, BUT I STILL CAN'T UNDERSTAND IT, IT CAN'T BE, WHY CAN'T I FEEL?
U NEVER KNOW, CAUSE U NEVER SEE, WHAT LIES THERE SO BLATANTLY AND MEANS A WORLD U COULD SEE, IS ALL BLURRY AND SEIZED BY THE POWERS THAT BE THAT CREATE DESTINY.






AND THE ANSWER IS...