i was almost an abortion

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Do You Know Where You're Going To

Theme from Mahogany (Do You Know Where You're Going To) - Diana Ross

there's a strange smell in the air when things change.
everything starts to look different,
take on more defined shapes,
colors become more vivid,
textures come into focus from fuzzy to slick,
scents emerge and fill the air with fragrant scents,
flowers bloom,
grass grows,
glaciers melt,
children grow,
life continues,
and everything takes it's righteous place.
remember, a butterfly is not always a beautiful creature.
it starts as a hairy worm,
only to cocoon itself and transform into a thing of pure beauty.

many years have passed as i've sat in my cocoon.
alone, ready to break out, yet,
unable to, as the timing just wasn't perfect.
but as the days tick by,
the evolution of my destiny becomes a necessity,
and time is of the essence.
the months i have spent relearning life,
reconfiguring who and what i can be,
how i can develop and recreate my image
so that the ugly caterpillar inside me
can blossom into the butterfly,
and soar the clear blue skies.

i feel the cocoon around me break cell by cell,
i hear the crunch,
i feel myself expand, stretch, develop.
i feel the wings beneath my back
start to grow and crack the shell.
my arms reach out, grasping at the air around them.
my legs push hard,
hoping to touch ground and take off running.
beams of the outside light appear
causing chaos, confusion, and clarity, all at once.
as i brace myself to expose what's been hidden inside for too long,
my mind rewinds and revisits where it's been...
remembers where it came from,
and recalls the hard times it's had.
because no matter how beautiful a butterfly becomes,
no matter how high it fly's,
it was still, once,
an ugly caterpillar with a hope of a better day.

but, do we ever really know
where we're going to?
if you like the things that life is showing you,
then you are lucky...
if you don't,
if you know everything should/could and would be different
if you just pushed a little harder,
than kick, scream, push.

No comments: