i was almost an abortion

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

me, myself, and i.

fuck, i'm exhausted, but wide awake.
i can't imagine laying in bed right now.
and do whjat?
i have way too much to think about.
i have plans to make,
preperations to adhere to,
i need to re-create what has been re-created so many times now,
that it's actually now just silly...
but i know i can do it.
i never rush things, i never ask "when/why/how/who?"
because when it's supposed to show itself,
it will.
on it's own time.
but to be honest, that philosophy
has always been my motto and my destiny.
but this time, i need to knock on destiny's door
and ask her to please hurry the fuck up,
i am not fucking playing around gurl,

i need to know,
and i need to know now.

is that clear?

so, well, now it's like,
exactly 2:30 and now that i had an hour on Photoshop,
ate again,
smoked a pack of newports
and smoked some excellent weed,
i'm feeling my eyelids begin to fall.
i feel myself winding down
breathing, and,
even feeling sleepy.
sometimes i just don't sleep.
i like to work in the middle of the night because it's so so so so quiet.
no phones, tv, buddy, nada...
just me, myself, and i.

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