every day, i wake up, and think....
today's the day.
well, then tonight is here faster than you can say tomorrow...
and then it's next week, and then it's June...and you think...
what the fuck, where am i?
where did my youth go?
why am i still stuck in the same place?
how do i get outta here?
but the thing is, it's a vicious cycle, it spins and spins and spins,
endlessly and relentlessly,
until it's too late.
it's not right, but it's okay...
if you recognize it while it's happening, quite possibly,
you can change it from ever starting again.
if you nip it in the bud and instead of procrastinating,
do something productive and actually talk a stand,
make the call,
reach out,
get out of bed, shut off the television,
take a shower and focus, hone in on what you want,
how to get there, and take one step at a time, and trust me,
tomorrow will be a different day.
because my life
was almost not,
because i thought
about it a lot.
because i never
forgot the past,
because i always
said many thanks,
because i try
because i do
because i will
and someday, soon...
become what destiny
has in store for me,
because of that,
i know i'll be
the thing i've been
pushing away for years,
the man who i'm
supposed to be,
is what i know
deep down, you'll see.
i may not be perfect,
i may not be great
but what i am
you can't debate.
the show begins,
in seconds flat
so don't be late,
just sit back.
enjoy the show,
it will make you see
the things that you had thought of me,
were just illussions
of who i used to be.
sometimes you get jaded, just because it's natural when you're a city boy. been there, done that, seen it all done them all, it just becomes almost natural to roll your eyes at something that's just ordinary, or just boring...then one day, someone does something completely out of the blue, from left field....and it comes so unexpectidly that it literally throws you so far from the loop, that you have to actually stop, rethink and recalculate what you've just seen, and catch your breath...try to stop time and hopefully move backwards so you can turn back time...and forget what you'd just seen, hoping the movement back in time and space makes this person who's just blown you away, actually have brain cells enough to rethink what they were just about to do or say.
but it's not humanly possible, so you are left speechless and shaking, heart pounding, sweat dripping...but what if, it gets worse, and you're somewhere trapped alone with this person, and as hard as you look, theres just no where to hide, no where to run, nothing to do, but have to deal with it, directly...
someone, a trick, during a somewhat normal sexual encounter, in a field of craziness i thought i had a grasp on, today, this afternoon, around 2pm, actually made me see that i am not as jaded as i had thought...i was actually about to learn a lesson in something i truly believed i could write a dictionary on. sexual deviants are common, i think, because in everyone's closet, is always a rotting skeleton. some of them are gentle whispering ghosts, while others haven't come to grips with what and why they are so twisted...sexual deviants, i imagine, have a hard time controling the life around them when they get turned on by something bizarre. when an extreme fetish is tantalized, it becomes overly aroused and cannot explain or take hold of themselves, for the very idea that one of their strange to the outside world fantasies may come true, they almost burst on the scene, without any power over their actions.
sexual deviants...oh, lord, deviants of any kind, but sexual, is just a trip. honestly, i have my own brand of fetish, but it's not so bizarre...to me anyway. but today, in the middle of a mutual sucking session, the guy had a great cock, nice balls, he was a little chubby, but it was more of a beer belly than anything else. anyway, he asked to rim me. of course i said, as i was always happy to have someone eat my ass....but then he asked me to sit on the edge of his weight bench, i thought it was interesting, and a new way to get a tongue up my ass, so i obliged. i stroked my dick and closed my eyes, this guy was actually kinda fun. i liked him, had been laughing and comfortable, and was enjoying playing with Mike, or Steve, or Bob....whatever his name was. he was fun.
then he went down under the weight bench seat, i believed to shove his tongue up me, but instead, i heard something behind and slide under me. and then, without notice, i felt some cold piece of metal slide on my asscheeks, and land directly inside my asshole. i jumped and screamed, kinda like a ittle girl, but whatever, i jumped. he grabbed my hips and shoved me back down and asked me in a low, whispering, sexual voice, if i could take a dump. ok, um, no, what? i laughed and tried to move this metal from inside my hole, and as i got up and turned around, i saw that under me, and in my ass, was a record player that when i gasped to catch my breath for a minute, he started, and put the needle on the record, and in the 10 seconds or so it took me to get a hold of myself, started playing Sargent Peppers Lonley Hearts Club Band, I Get High With A Little Help From My Friends. i mean, i always hated the Beatles, but even if i had to shit diareah from hell or Indian food, would i deficate on them. it took me till the corus ended to put my hair back into a bun, and i heard myself, trying to gain composure, ask him what the turntable fetish was about, and why shit on it? and why this song? my mind raced with ideas of just how a fetish like this starts...a lonely child raised in the 60's-70's, got a turntable for his 6th birthday, but something happened, and at the moment it happened, this song, the number one song of the week came on the radio, and to this day, when he hears it, it brings back horrific memories of a single hideous moment in time....something like that.
where do we get our desires that take over and delve us into a world so black, a place so low, a fetish so strange.
sexual deviants...
an interesting bunch.
a subculture of sexual deviants that lives right next door or in the same house a syou, yet you never know. until one day...
i want more.
tons more.
i want it all.
i want it now.
i have no more time to waste...
no more excuses left to make.
the time has come,
and so i take
responsibility
for my own fate.
30 days has september
april jun and november
all the rest have 31.
which means i don't have a lot of time to get my shit together and get this video project done.
i had a fun couple i practiced videoing last night.
i love having friends who call me up and ask me to shoot them fucking.
good friends.
they keep me motivated,
inspired,
and boned...
always a good combo.
last night took my videoing a little further,
as somethin,
i can't tell u what...
happened which made the perspective even more interactive.
brought it to a different level,
and made the video have a vintage 3D feel that i've not yet seen.
it was cool to look at the foootage and gag.
i rarely gag at anything i do,
i never gag at anything anyone else does,
well, rarely...
but this was an experiment gone right.
it's starting to flow.
it's taking shape and forming itself
without much help, just from practice.
i am starting to understand the importance of every move i make lately,
as every move is taking me closer to a place i've envisioned my entire life.
another place.
another step.
a higher level.
i hate to sound conceided, but...
i think i will do something that will be so different.
modern, yet classic.
interesting, but still hot.
done with my flavor of surprise,
twists, and turns that take your mind to a place you never dreamed.
yet, at the same time,
will keep your cock dripping.
leaking.
oozing cum.
that's my job.
that's what i do.
and honestly,
i know i do it better than anyone else.
so now, for the next month,
i reign myself in.
hone in and disect,
reevaluate what i've done,
reinvent what's been done,
and retaliate against what the studios do,
recreate, rethink and redo
everything that you know,
everything you've seen,
everything you thought.
it's a hard job,
but somebodys gotta do it.
The Best of David Guetta 2012
sometimes u don't expect things to turn out good...
sometimes you have a premenition that things won't be as fun and casual as they may seem,
sometimes you think too much...
tonight, earlier, i thought too much.
my buddy upstate invited me to hang w/him n his boyfriend,
it was asked in a very sexual way, meaning,
would u like to come over n have sex with us...
but not so direct.
i got there, kinda thinking it would maybe be weird.
maybe they'd have jealousy issues or something stupid.
maybe they would chicken out...
maybe they'd fight, argue, be bitchy...
but i got there, we smoked some good weed,
hung out, talked, it was very comfortable...
and then outta nowhere, we were fucking.
was perfect.
both of em were sexy, both had nice cocks,
both were open to pretty much anything,
and neither was neglectful or careless toward the other one.
we all took turns,
sucking, i fucked both, was hot...
and once in a while, one of us would kick back n watch the other 2 have fun.
now, that's what i call a nice saurday night.
no drama,
no bullshit,
just three pigs having fun.
my ex and i used to have 3 ways when i was cracked out.
i would tell him to invite over one of our fuckbuds who we know we have fun with.
he always declined,
he wanted new meat...
(bottoms, never satisfied)
so id let him go online, do his thing, find a new cock...
but the guys would come over,
get high, and the next thing you knew,
these "tops" were all about their holes...
so i'd fuck em, which made my ex mad,
and me having to deal with his drama for the next 2 days.
couples should understand that this is a very intricate part of the relationship.
i mean, we all want to have some new fresh meat every once in a while,
but just remember, it's just one night...
whatever happens hapens.
it's not a big deal...
so ladies,
take a hint and consider this a reminder, and/or a lesson.
if ur in a relationship n have a 3way (or more)
remember that the 3rd is really innocent of ur bs.
has no idea how u guys relate to each other,
or what your energy or groove is, so,
just relax, have fun, and fuck.
if your the 3rd...
be diplomatic.
ur not there cause u like one of them,
ur there to be the toy for both,
so act ur age and play with both, enjoy their differences,
enjoy the way they interact, and maybe one day,
when your the one bringing in the 3rd,
you'll be happy, cause it'll all work out better than you thought.
just a little reminder bulletin for u guys..
play nice,
be good,
respect others,
and you'll enjoy yoursef so much more.
trust.
ok, well, i did it.
after a 4 month hiatus from Facebook,
after i was kicked off for an unprecidented 13th time,
i decided to go back and reconnect with the modern world,
and old friends i haven't spoken to or seen in 4 months, at least.
and you know what,
i realized that i really did miss it.
i missed the funny comments,
the sweet messages
and the faces of my peeps,
as well as meeting and communicatinng with new friends.
oh god, now i sound like an advertisement for the fuckin site,
but really, it's nice, and i missed it,
and i'm back,
so friend me,
and let's talk.
this time i am actually using my real name, joe oppedisano,
so i'll be easy to find.
also, check out my new tumblr page...
it's just staring, slowly,
but at least i am moving forward in the right direction..
xo
