i was almost an abortion

never once
have you even tried
to be my friend,
and stand by my side.
instead you choose
to overlook
the times i tried.
i guess i mistook
the fact that everything i do
was nothing more
than misconstrued.
by me trying
by me crying
by my applying
by me deciding
that i wanted something other than
the life you chose for me,
now i understand.
you said you'd be there,
through thick or thin,
i guess i thought
you'd be there till the end.
i guess i thought
i guess you walked
i guess i'll see
life without the you in "we".
but why now, exactly
did you choose
to stand back and
just watch me lose?
wasn't there a better time
when i was almost
doing fine?
but then i guess
i wouldn't see
the reality
of you and me.
times are tough
times are hard,
and now your love
i must discard.
it's really sad,
it sucks, you'll see,
i promise you
no more of me.
so don't say that
i didn't try,
for if you do,
i won't deny
that every single day i stood
and nights alone,
and weeks i should
have been out there
living just for me,
instead it's now,
i really see,
exactly what you thought of me.

i was almost an abortion,
somedays i pray,
cause if i was
there'd be no day
that my heart would be so shattered
my life crushed,
my bones battered,
by someone i thought
truly mattered.
i guess that's life.
i guess thats it,
so long.
farewell.
enough.
i quit.